I recently had a conversation with a friend where I shared my story and offered advice. I wanted share my part to you.
I hope you get something from it.
I made some radical changes over the past few years. My best answer is to get use to failing forward cause that's the only real way it works.
With smoking, weight loss, fitness, my spirituality... I had to stop waiting for the perfect plan to pass. It won't land in your lap. If you wait, you'll start getting real good at waiting.
In the beginning, it was an ugly, sloppy, poor excuse of doggy paddling against a rip current. Sometimes it still does. But guess what. Eventually I found forward momentum in all things. You can too.
With smoking, I couldn't find a way to quit, but I found a transition from cigarettes to a vape pen. But it wasn't immediate. You got to understand, using the vape pen every other nic fit is progress. You can make it your goal and work on it until it's a habit. Once there, you can make the goal 2 of 3 time the vape pen, then keep adjusting your goal as you go along.
Yes your eventual goal is to quit but not even Ikea makes 1 step plans.
What else, sometime you falter and have to take a few steps back. You know sometimes you gotta step back to get forward moment to leap across that gap. Not every step is supposed to be forward.
And it sucks at times. If I could tell you the time I wanted to quit. There were times after I vaped, I still lit up a smoke. You're not supposed to figure it out the first time. Where's the victory in that. I know it sucks looking forward but I tell you when you look back and see all the obstacles you overcame...
I tell you when I started I sucked. It was brutal pulling myself up by my bootstraps. But after a few tries, guess what, I started to figure out the rhythm of transition. It's like riding a bike for the first time. You're gonna fall. Your gonna fall again. After enough falling and failing, it starts get familiar. Then you are gonna fall a few more times. But you will get it.
Donuts and Kaloches
Kind of like saying no to the donuts on Friday Man, my company brings them in every Friday. You know how hard it is to say no to those when you are 300 lbs? What's more, they have the gall to also bring kaloches. Got to be kidding me.
Last year I was 2 donut, 2 kaloches in before I even realized I was eating. They were already in my gut before I had the chance to regret my decision. Same for smoking when I was trying to quit.
I realized it was a weakness of mine. When blindsided on something you're weak on, you get bowled over. But when you're expecting it..
Then you can start defending against it. When you know what's about to happen, you have time to cast dietary magic armor and deflect.
But don't stay too long, that mage armor goes away faster than you think in the beginning. There were times those cravings roll natural 20s and crit me. I'd swan dive right into the box and swim in glaze. Same with smoking.
Eventually my body grew used to saying no. The donut, the kaloche, the cigarette, the sitting on my fat ass all day. The depression.
Was it easy? Never. But I tell you, it was worth it. And every experience has given me the faith to push forward even more. It's pretty cool. You should try it.